Breath of Fresh Air Friday

Hey. I know it's been forever, but I had a root canal, so slack should be cut.

I've decided that every Friday we should stop and appreciate the good commercials out there. Just so we don't drown in negativity, because I assure you there's plenty more of that to come. So without further ado, I present you with:

Emma is everyone's favorite Spice Girl, let's just face that. Kudos to Prego's advertising agency for the clever connection between spice and spice girl. This is cute and British and to the point (fifteen seconds, I love it!).

Put your hands where I can see them!

Burger King is slowly but surely turning into Fat 'n Creepy King. Giant weird mascot, steady menu of nauseatingly fattening "meals," the signs are all there. The announcer's monotonous tone just enhances the weird factor, too.

The Buger Kind mascot was creepy when he was a dude in a suit. Now he's a robot? Oh, God. He's going to take over the world.

Also: "He's so good with his hands?" Creepy! I don't even know how to interpret that. Do I want to? Where did that purple haired future woman come from, anyway? Bottom line, I think we should keep the future's breakfast menu in the future.

You're there? Glad I'm not!

"I'm where bad acting meets where the hell did this giant red dot come from?"

It's not about the buffalo wings...

This commercial is easy for a girl to hate for obvious reasons, but I'd like to point out some things that may not have initially occurred to you.

First and foremost, the girlfriend is stupid for agreeing to eat at this whore-infested diner and, moreover, date this lascivious dolt. By the way, is that Chad? Yeah, it's Chad.

The serious problem with this commercial, however, is the nasty waitress's name. I don't think you can see it on the YouTubes version, but her name tag says "Sarah." Sarah is a nice, good, wholesome name. She didn't have to have a name, why disgrace the name of hundreds of thousands of women across the world? I bet the director had just broken up with an amazing girl named Sarah and named the waitress in spite of her. But now I'm personally offended. Thanks, guys.

Ever seen a commercial that just makes you want to bash your head in?

I know I have. Hi, I'm Sarah. This is my commercial bashing blog. Commercials often aggravate me. I come from a family where advertising scrutinizing is a common pastime; both of my parents either are or were at one point in time "in" advertising. Bad advertising is rampant in our media, and it's my mission to exploit and criticize it. Here we go.

I don't care if Kate Walsh is a good actress or that she's on everybody's favorite show or that she's beautiful. This is a stupid commercial that makes me hate Cadillacs twice as much as I already did.

No, Walsh, my car does not turn me on. Furthermore, I do not want it to turn me on. Let's take a moment to consider what it would be like if every time someone turned the key to their massive, ugly, gas-sucking SUVs, they got "turned on." I don't think I need to elaborate.